‘Men grieve differently’

Some of the fathers who attended the program had not left their homes since losing their sons on Oct. 7, 2023, but they came because they felt it was a place where they would be truly understood.

“Men absolutely grieve differently,” Israeli clinical psychologist Dr. Oren Gur said in an episode of the Israeli bereavement podcast The Life After Death in June 2025. “Men often process grief silently, turning inward or channeling it into physical action. When we don’t give men specialized spaces to let their guard down, that repressed grief manifests as severe emotional isolation, anger or total burnout.”

Gur is among many mental health experts in Israel and elsewhere who have highlighted the unique emotional needs of bereaved men.

The event included performances by Israeli musicians Raviv Kaner and Noam Buskila and a surprise appearance by IDF reservist and singer Matan Hassan.

‘I look to the future’

“Unity above all” was written on some of the T-shirts worn by the fathers.

Katz, the father of Sgt. Moshe Yitzhak Katz, addressed this fellow bereaved fathers:

“They called him a lone soldier,” he said, referring to his son, a paratrooper who was killed while serving the country at the age of 22. “What I learned after his passing is that he was far from alone.”

“Regardless of affiliation or religious background, my son was able to unite many,” Katz, a Chabad Chasid, continued. “How can you call him a lone soldier? So many of you are in the same shoes as I am. Losing a child—the pain has no end. I, too, have been able to connect, like my son ... to connect with all of you. I am inspired by all of you. I join in your sorrow and pain. Yet I look to the future. I see the souls of all your children connected with my son.”

“I only wish there weren’t so many bereaved families,” said Coby Samerano, the father of Yoni Samerano, 21, who was taken to Gaza and murdered by Hamas terrorists on Oct. 7. “But since that has become our reality, being together gives us the strength to lift our heads high and strive to be worthy of our children’s legacy.”

‘A historic moment’

Hayeladim Shelanu currently supports nearly 2,000 bereaved families across Israel, providing emotional, practical and community-based assistance. After years of supporting widows, mothers and children, the organization recently expanded its work by establishing more than 10 support groups for bereaved fathers, which now meet regularly throughout the country.

“This evening is much more than an event. For me, it is a historic moment,” CEO Waks said. “For the past 1,005 days, we have stood beside bereaved families, cried with them, embraced them and promised they would never be alone.”

“Tonight is the realization of a vision: hundreds of bereaved fathers from every part of Israeli society sitting together as one family. There is no right or left, no religious or secular. There is only one people—the people of Israel,” he said.

Many fathers remained after the event ended, exchanging contact information and embracing one another.

“If every father leaves here feeling seen, loved and supported by a family that will continue walking beside him tomorrow, then we have succeeded. This is only the beginning.”

Originally published at: jns.org